The DuMdUm World

A World Where Passion Rules Reason,
And Reason is the only soverign.

About.Me

-YC Lee
-25/07/1983
-Poker Player
-Bainin
-Hikkikomori


FRIENDS

Audrey + Margaret + Irene + Katherine +

LINKS

NewbieHoldem + UltimateBet +

PREVIOUS POSTS

I just went for a 1 hour run to clear my mind. Bi...
Very long never update le... Recently having nigh...
Where have I gone? I once stood tall and proud, r...
Wow very sian, boss keep pushing me back ask me to...
Wah recently very sian... No mood to do things sia...
Today just finish all my exams! Finally the menta...
Exams tomorrow! Going to sleep already... Haha so...
2 more days. Tomorrow is the last day before my e...
Today was damn sian, was supposed to go simei to s...
Quite a few days never update my blog already. Ac...

ARCHIVES

04/01/2003 - 05/01/2003
05/01/2003 - 06/01/2003
06/01/2003 - 07/01/2003
07/01/2003 - 08/01/2003
08/01/2003 - 09/01/2003
09/01/2003 - 10/01/2003
10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003
11/01/2003 - 12/01/2003
12/01/2003 - 01/01/2004
01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004
02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004
03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004
04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004
06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005
05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006
06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006
07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006
08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006
09/01/2006 - 10/01/2006
10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006
11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006
12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007
01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007
02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007
03/01/2007 - 04/01/2007
04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007
05/01/2007 - 06/01/2007
06/01/2007 - 07/01/2007
05/01/2008 - 06/01/2008
06/01/2008 - 07/01/2008
07/01/2008 - 08/01/2008
08/01/2008 - 09/01/2008
02/01/2009 - 03/01/2009
03/01/2009 - 04/01/2009
04/01/2009 - 05/01/2009
05/01/2009 - 06/01/2009
06/01/2009 - 07/01/2009
07/01/2009 - 08/01/2009

Sunday, August 31, 2003

Okay, Sunday. TOTALLY DEPRESSING DAY. I bought a gloomy... Got a pink glow sheep, luna wanted a pink glow gloomy but i gave her the sheep anyway. She was XD!!!!!!!!!! Then >_< Then -.- then ;(. She liked it very much but she felt very guilty taking it from me. Why cause i overdo it, i shower her with too many things. Too many of some things are always not good. Well we walked back to Taka Mac to find the rest of the people. Then there's where i got 2nd news. Didn't close a deal. a big deal. a 10k deal. OMG WHY EVERYTHING GO WRONG TODAY! I really feel damn sian already. Want to just go and vent my frustration. But then see iris taking the camera, taking pictures, got pictures of luna, most prob gonna get them in my phone. Nvm feel still ok.
Crushing blow No.3. Went to cine to have dinner, only jon eat. The rest eat at macdonalds liao mah. Then luna pick up phone, sit far away... Chat until so happy, in her own special world. A world i dun belong in. I finally realise that i'm not in her world. I'm just a bystander in the crowd. Wanted to go somewhere. Anywhere i could drown my sorrows. 3 blows in 1 day... A long time i never felt this way already. But dun worry, i have sworn, that even if you bring me to my knees even if you bury me in the ground. I will climb back and my life will go on. 0 downtime. I give myself till tomorrow morning to end my sadness.

I really like her very much, but i guess it really is time i stopped myself. She sent me messages telling me to stop wasting my time stop giving her things. She never asked for it, but she like it. She told me to dun be like that, or else next time i will easily be make use of by girls. So sweet. ;( U all dun understand her at all. For those of you who think she's been making use of me, please understand that she from the start made it clear she had no intention of going out with me. That she never liked me. But i just tried anyway, why? Cause i wanted to try anyway... Pls don't accuse or smear your impression of her because of my foolishness. I think, i really should stop, before things go out of hand. Both for myself and for her sake.

Some things, money just can't buy. Health love and respect. So what if i got money? The price is too high to pay. I wish nobody follows my foot steps. But its too late for me now already. My path has been chosen and i have to walk it through... Or in the end... I will have nothing at all.

(0) So Waddaya Think! 10:44:00 AM

Saturday, August 30, 2003

Omg damn sian, done so many projects and finally then starting to get my money rolling in. 3 month credit is the sucks! Nobody wants to pay early!!! Well about time i stopped taking new projects, finish the ones i am doing and do Luna Works! My own page so that weishu can go around making sales through my site as reference. Gotta remember to print some of the projects for him too...

My work has totally slowed down... Now i'm mostly doing my work in my office... can't do them at home, just feel like logging on irc, looking for ppl to talk to. Not feeling my best lately. Dunno why, just feel damn weird about myself...

Well did a little bit of work this morning, FLASHKIT BATTLES! OMG i think i'm addicted to flashkit battles, taking images and pictures, editing and modifying it to make it look super good! Print outs! Damn, time to touch up on my photoshop skills too... If i ever want to be as good as them! This is better than wc3 anyday!

Oh yeah today Luna dress very different. Not like a kiddy liao, like more mature dressing. Well looks nice too, but i prefer her the way she used to dress. I dun mean she looks bad or what la... Just not used to this image. Hmm i've used up most of my ideas already and given her almost everything that i think is nice and that i think she will love to have. Now its time to observe again. I'm the hunter! I never miss anything!

Ah, final paragraph of my blog. This morning flashkit battle, battling halfway, my ex call me. She doing flag day at bugis ask me to go donate. So i finished up my work, posted my volley and went down lor. Ah just spent some time walking talking. Hmm last time i saw her was this year feb. About 1 year after we broke up. Feb i still could not forget her, still feel a connection with her. Now i guess i really put her behind me already. I dun feel anything when i go out with her. It feels too normal. Almost like when i go out with the bugis guys, or some of my friends. Just normal nothing. I guess i've really emptied my heart of other people. And filled it with the moon. I wonder if the moon will feel for me the way i feel for her now... Only time can tell! XD

(0) So Waddaya Think! 11:15:00 AM

Friday, August 29, 2003

Ok finish DSD's simple site. Put most of the pages still static. Looks average average. Maybe too plain for my port folio. But that's how they want it anyway >_< Plain simple and a "Happy clean feel". Well that's what i gave them! Now just left with designing a logo for them and LUNAWORKS!

Got this whole idea on what to do with luna works...just no time to do it! Oh yeah checked it all out. Wonder if she wants to go to skin center? They say that place is the best liao wor... Within 2 months or izzit 2 weeks? everything will be ALL CLEAR!
XD
Looks ok to me... she's still as cute and as irresistable as ever. Doesn't she know that?

(0) So Waddaya Think! 10:20:00 AM

Thursday, August 28, 2003

Finished DSD's simple flash. Now gonna bring to work tmr and UPLOAD! FINISHED YET ANOTHER SITE!!!
Next will be lunawork.tk
LUNAWORKS That's what i call my business freelance XD
LunaWorks
so cute so sweet
so lovely XD

(0) So Waddaya Think! 9:10:00 AM

Tuesday, August 26, 2003

Whoa so exciting! The red moon rises! The sky is red on fire! Just as ancient myths and prophecy foretold. I wonder if some major event some mystical event will occur? What if magic and miracles seep into the world through this conjunction! What if terror emerges? The red moon rises, blood will be spilled!

Well even if nothing big happens, there will still be twice the LUNA effect ;P I mean lunar >_<. 2 Lunas in 1 night. But isnt 1 more than enough? *smile*

(0) So Waddaya Think! 9:30:00 AM

Monday, August 25, 2003

Ahh religion is part and parcel of life. With religion you find yourself more aware of yourself, more focused on your work and doing it more efficiently. You answer to someone bigger than yourself. Well i never accepted christianity, and i was talking with my friends. Yeah maybe that is what will keep my motivation for work going. Nowadays, i slack too much. Come home take a break watch tv... irc... chat... and i sleep early even!
OMG
WTF is happening to me? I need to reassess myself and to work towards my goal now. Losing motivation at the beginning... is the worst sign! How am i ever gonna accomplish anything if i dun work with my motivation? WORK ON DUDE! Must remind myself not to slack anymore!

But its bed time now ^.^ Damn it, sleeping so early again?

(0) So Waddaya Think! 10:04:00 AM

Sunday, August 24, 2003

Today went to watch movie. Finally watch LoEG already! And watch with luna some more! XD. of course with the rest of the shoxx ppl lah... But today sit next to luna, she reserve seat for me ^.^ Ahh can't stop noticing her at my side. >_<

Ah got share pop corn and then finally! Finally i have given her the nod head relaxing destress thing XD. She so happy. Haha... I also happy XD

Went to CrazY eLEPhanT! Heard a lot of BLUES. Free jamming session with lots of people going on stage replacing each other. Playing together for the first time. WHOA really takes a LOT of skill. And i tell you, the drummer is O_O. LI HAI!

(0) So Waddaya Think! 10:02:00 AM

Saturday, August 23, 2003

Wah last night chiong work until this morning. All for the sake of going to natsu matsuri. Damn tired. This afternoon slept a bit, then 3-4 something went out to meet them liao. WAHAHAHA
WELL WORTH THE HARD WORK!!!

I really enjoy myself there. Lucky ah long jio me go. And lucky i go! Wear the yukata hmm... Very hot, but then feels very nice leh XD. Haha i think it looks very nice! The food is good, then can catch the gold fish at the games there. Use the paper scoop. Just like in the japanese movies. ;D So many people there! So crowded and so fun! And a lot of japanese xiao children. Wahaha then i took a picture of a little girl with my phone. I tell the mother... "Can take picture? Kawaii ne!" Then she smile and let me take XD

Din really go play the games ah. SO LONG QUEUE! But then got to get food, get drink and well... Dance! They have mass dance in the middle where everyone join in and dance. Just like in the japanese movies. SO FUN! Too bad Luna dowan to join in ;(. Oh gave her 2 of the gold fish i caught today. She looked so happy! I feel so happy too... but now so tired. Wanna sleep sia...

(0) So Waddaya Think! 10:26:00 AM

Thursday, August 21, 2003

Whoa this week is finally over!
Just bought new handphone. 3650! Dunno how to use! Never use color phone before! LOL!!!
Nvm now can use it to take pictures for my webby!
Take night sky!
Time to start working on my portfolio page
XD
Time to take a picture of some special person
and put her picture there to inspire me everyday!

(0) So Waddaya Think! 9:10:00 AM

Sunday, August 17, 2003

SHIT I CLOSED MY BLOG AND FORGOT TO POST!

DAMN I HAVE TO RETYPE EVERYTHING

Ok lets try to see what i remember. Ok first off, today i whole day very restless at home doing stuff mainly. Wanting to go out wanting to see luna but then -.-. Ok nvm when am i not like that XD

Next would have to be was thinking about my first band and how i left them. How we were so close friends, could spend weekends at their place could do almost everything together and how now i dun msg them or they dun have time for me. Ah but what the heck right? I mean friends are not forever, at least i dun think i have any forever friends. Who could truly say they understand me? Truly support what i am doing and truly 100% are behind me? Everyone i know is like. Put on a front and live their life. I also damn sian already.

Now some advice to our viewers! Many words ahead XD

Most probably you guys think i'm uttering rubbish or nonsense. Most of you dun believe what i say but i'm just going to write down what i have learnt so far. To be successful, its not too difficult, but its not easy too. You just have to stick by the rules. And i dun mean being successful as in being successful in your job, your marriage, your friends, your band or what. Its being successful... In life. Cause after all, if you wanna be successful in anything, you must be successful in being a person. Its very simple, its like warcraft. PP. Perfect Play. Everything u do must be done to your best, every small thing. Cause if you can't do simple things perfectly, how can u do big things without difficulties? It doesnt matter if you are in a lousy school, just be the best in your school. Doesnt matter if you are a lowly paid staff. Just be the best staff. Cause only when you give it your best, can u go on with no regrets. And you are only successful, because you prepare yourself to be successful. You set realistic goals. Like you want a definite income, you want to win that person's heart. You want that car of your dreams. You want to be what you want to be. Its only when you acknowledge what you truly want, can you then set your foot onto getting it. Once you know what you want, you must believe u can do it. You must believe u can make it. Dun think that you are only a poly student u are a O level student or even u have no education. You can't do shit. Bill gates is a dropout. There are a lot of other people who drop out of school to do what they want and they are successful. You know why? Because they believe they can do it, because they want to show the world they can do it. If the guy who made light bulbs and electricity and the dumdum brothers who invented the airplane did not have dreams, did not have goals. If they did not have confidence in what they do, would we have what we have today? Imagine. Electricity, LIGHT from nothing. Its a miracle by standards. Flying in the sky soaring above the birds. Its a miracle. And what you want, its not even half as big by these standards. What you want, a decent income? A nice place to stay? A nice car? So many people before you already have these. Its so much easier to obtain. A person's heart? All i can say is if you believe in yourself you believe in your goal. Never falther, never step aside from the road that brings you to the goal, you will step there. Even if it means crawling you will eventually get there. Such is the power that you have. The power of your mind. The believe that you can succeed. To want to succeed. And most importantly, perserverence. Don't give up because you fail once, you fail twice, or even a hundred times. Rome wasnt built in a day. If Edison had not failed 9999 times, u would not have your lightbulb today. "Before I got through, he recalled, I tested no fewer than 6,000 vegetable growths, and ransacked the world for the most suitable filament material." Its beacuse of his perserverance that we have what we have today. A Miracle. That's why against all odds, i am going to do what i do now. To prove that success is possible but its not easy. So that the people closest to me, can be convinced. And can be successful too. Together we will reach higher peaks. Higher than what we have ever dreamt of. And that is why, i will never give up no matter how much heartache i get from luna. Cause i know that the harder the challenges, the more perserverance i need. But one day, everything will fall into place.

(0) So Waddaya Think! 11:07:00 AM

Saturday, August 16, 2003

Haha today take half day break. Went out to AKANE birthday XD. Luna was there too!!! At graffiti she keep on looking into the arcade looking for the guy she likes. What can i do? She look at the guy i look at her lor. Heartache. Well, not really heartache. How to say, it pains me that she is looking that side lor, but at the same time looking at her innocent smile and her sweet tender face... XD My heart also will melt.

Maybe now, i really dun mind that she likes someone else lor, cause everytime i see her smile, i smile also. But i only scared of 1 thing... What if her feeling get cheated by that guy leh? Dun think will lah she is not small kiddie liao. But then also can't bear to see an ounce of pain in her eyes. I confirm drive car knock the guy if that happen! LOL.

Hmm i dun think luna's complexion is bad. Maybe i'm crazy >_< but i think her face is more like rosy. And i think she still looks good. Still as kawaii ne! Hope can get her to watch movie end of next week XD.

(0) So Waddaya Think! 12:42:00 PM

Friday, August 15, 2003

She canceled this saturday movie...
Nevermind we will watch some other time XD

LUNA! *thinking* ;D beatiful kawaii face

(0) So Waddaya Think! 3:56:00 AM

Thursday, August 14, 2003

She messaged me!!!!
Maybe got time to watch movie this weekend. Whoa this message is 100x stronger than coffee
:D
she is kawaii ne

(0) So Waddaya Think! 10:31:00 AM

Wednesday, August 13, 2003

Luna likes other people.

I swore to myself that i will have 0 downtime. No matter how hard it is, no matter what news i get. I will win her heart when the time comes. For now i cannot be disheartened by anything. Even if its a dagger through my heart, i must crawl myself to the finish line.

Means too much to me. I will never give up.

(0) So Waddaya Think! 9:18:00 AM

Monday, August 11, 2003

I will never give up! I will never stop! Fully motivated today. Why? By a simple gesture from my friend. And he did not know how much it meant to me.

"Today's moon is very beautiful. Today we can not lose."

When i heard that sentence i my eyes tear up. The moon was orange in the dark blue sky. Big and round. And beautiful... Beautiful... Because of this moon, i will give up my life and fight for my future. Company car achiever. CCB I must get it. I don't fear anything. As long as it will get me that far. I will never say no.

(0) So Waddaya Think! 10:24:00 AM

Sunday, August 10, 2003

ah took a break yesterday from all my work and went to ndp. Din really go to watch ndp though.... called my friends from my workplace ask them to go eat dinner with me. In the end everyone is either at ndp, at bugis or at sentosa. But only person not at those places was Yi Fei, my old sec sch friend XD Girl guide junior. Since she stay so close to my place so i thought maybe meet her for dinner then walk walk and go home together lor. Din intend to stay out for long anyway.. Got more work at home to finish!

Well just met her din eat, just drank at mos burger walk a bit. And a little bit of arcade (she insisted!). Then in the end went home liao lor. Haha but maurice saw me! OMG wait he will anyhow say things to my colleagues. i think of all the people who i tell, that i want to be someone and i want to have a good future... I want to live happily ever after with the xiao LUNA! XD no i am just kidding i know it will not happen. But then everything i do is to make others happy and i'm just hoping that next time the person i live with will be much happier. I like to see the smiles on ppl faces XD. anyway of all the people i tell i think only my boss, my colleagues and yifei think i can make it. But i know i will. Cause i got the motivation to do so. Every time i look at the moon XD

So long never update things into my blog already. For those who are sincerely worried about me dun worry i dun overwork myself. Maybe sometimes but i'm still good XD. For the other people who are probably laughing at me or making jokes about me ( >_<)_!_

That's all i have to say. be excellent to each other. And rock on dudes!

(0) So Waddaya Think! 10:15:00 AM

Thursday, August 07, 2003

Havent been updating my blog lately. Too busy with work. Try to keep it updated though...
So many projects and so many new job opportunities. Hardly get any sleep already. And so little time to relax

(0) So Waddaya Think! 8:49:00 AM

Sunday, August 03, 2003

Nothing can explain how i am feeling. Woke up from a dream i had. It was a dream with luna inside.

(0) So Waddaya Think! 6:34:00 PM

Nothing to update. Work

(0) So Waddaya Think! 9:32:00 AM

Saturday, August 02, 2003

Through the darkness
I can see your light
And you will always shine
And I can feel your heart in mine
Your face I've memorized
I idolize just you

I look up to
Everything you are
In my eyes you do no wrong
I've loved you for so long
And after all is said and done
You're still you
After all
You're still you

You walk past me
I can feel your pain
Time changes everything
One truth always stays the same
You're still you
After all
You're still you

I look up to
Everything you are
In my eyes you do no wrong
And I believe in you
Although you never asked me to
I will remember you
And what life put you through

And in this cruel and lonely world
I found one love
You're still you
After all
You're still you

I miss you

(0) So Waddaya Think! 12:09:00 PM